Monday, 25 August 2008

• suicide would be a wonderful release
  

  • 1:08 AM
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•  can't  stop  sobbing uncontrollable
  
  
  
  

  • 12:57 AM
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• I wonder Why she always wanted to keep are dating a secret.
  
  I think it was because she was ashamed of dating me
  
  she said it was because she didn't want to cause any drama
  
  how hard is it to say "yeah he's my boyfriend and i love him"?
  
  
  and the worst part is
  
  Because she rather keep it a secret i can't help wonder maybe she dated someone else in the mean time
  
  

  • 12:57 AM
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• My girlfriend, well ex girlfriend Sam broke up with me. and ever since i feel like half of what i used to be. I'm never happy. I put up this charade so that people will leave me be, But inside I'm screaming
  
  I say that I'm not suicidal, But i've been seriously thinking about it
  
  And its not just because of her  She was just the breaking point
  
  I really do feel broken inside
  
  I feel as if she used for her own self gratification and as soon as it was inconvenient she threw me away
  
  almost a year and a half I wasted with her
  
  I grew so a custom to having in my arms that i forgot the pain of being alone  
  
  All i want to do is be with her
  
  at any cost
  
  I'd do anything for her
  
  But i know she do nothing for me
  
  i love her still
  
  I can't except her not, I can't believe that these last months ment nothing to her and that it was a sick game or that her feeling changed
  
  I need her, more then i need the sun, more then i need my hands, or my eyes, I rather live the last ten minutes of my life with her then the last 70 years without
  
  And the worst thing is i know writing this will do nothing
  
  
  And I all I'll ever get is maybe a a pity fuck out of her convenience
  
  And the worst thing is I'm willing to break up with any current girlfriend for it
  
  

  • 12:52 AM
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